Month: October 2017

Blended Families: Tips for Combining Households

While joining families seems so easy when a couple is dating, the reality is not always so beautiful and smooth sailing. Once everyone is living under one roof, things can get ugly between who gets the bathroom first in the morning and who has to take the garbage out. There are a few things to remember when combining households in blended families.

Blended Families: Tips for Combining Households

Establish Rules

Children often have a hard time accepting leadership from a step-parent. So, parents should establish the rules together and relay those rules to all of the children together. This can include things like curfews, electronics time-limits, and household chores. When children know what is expected of them and that both parents are on board with the expectations, it is harder for them to disobey the rules.

Let Everyone Speak

Allow everyone in the family to specify their own limitations or needs. Sometimes there are simple things that kids don’t want to change from their previous lifestyle. If it’s something that can easily be continued like, “No one is allowed to borrow my clothes,” or “I need only Mom to read to me at night,” let them have their limit. Most importantly, make sure that everyone knows everyone else’s limits.

No Special Treatment

This should go without saying but all children need to be held to the same standard. There can be no special privileges for any that can’t be had by all. The negative effects of being left out can last a lifetime. In addition, consequences of negative actions should also be comparative, depending only on age and seriousness of the offense.

Schedule Family Time

Schedule family time and independent time. A family bond cannot be made when family members are never together. Put together a game night or a family dinner night so that everyone can interact in a healthy way. To the contrary, make sure that each individual is getting the right amount of private time. Being part of a bigger family can often mean never having your own space, which is equally important.

Protect Your Marriage

Keep the marital relationship strong. The children need to see a loving relationship with lots of positive communication. This is especially true when one of them comes to you with a problem. If you can work together to handle the problem for the child, they will value your bond and the family bond that much more.

Combining the households of blended families may seem challenging, but don’t worry, it can get better. If anyone in your household is struggling to adapt to the new living arrangement and would like to talk about it, or anything else, please Contact Us. Thanks.

Got the Blended-Family Blues? 12 Tips to Help Build Unbreakable Blended Families This Summer

5 Tips For Blended Families Struggling To Keep The Peace

Maintaining Your Sobriety Through The Holidays

As the holidays approach, many in recovery find the forced social situations less than enjoyable. As the work parties, social gatherings and family feasts begin, so does the steady flow of alcohol and in some situations, the drama and triggers which test one’s sobriety.

Maintaining Your Sobriety Through The Holidays

In a perfect world a person in recovery could enjoy these festivities with people who live their lives, in the same manner, the addict does but it is unrealistic to expect society to adhere to the same social restrictions. So, to walk, talk and play with others not battling an addition the addict needs a game plan. This holiday season, try these oldies but goodies to maintain your sobriety throughout the holidays.

  • During a party always have a non-alcoholic beverage in your hand so no one slips one with alcohol in it.
  • Let the host or hostess know ahead of time you plan on staying sober this year. If you aren’t comfortable talking of your sobriety tell them you are watching your weight or you’re in training.
  • Make sure you have a good support system with you wherever you go this season. Reach out to family and friends who are familiar with your plight. If you go to any support groups some have extra meetings this time of the year. If you need to attend five meetings a day to stay sober, do it!
  • If a trigger is an actual person you must see this holiday season think carefully before doing so. If you have a sponsor or friends to lean on before, during and after the required interaction, please do so.

You made the choice to be present in your life. Addiction waits for you. One drink, or using just once, places you right back where you were. You’ve come so far. The holidays are a time to celebrate and be thankful. Keep that in mind and be thankful for all you’ve done for you. Be good to you and stay sober. Please contact us if you ever need us. It’s why we’re here. Happy Holidays!